Sad to say, I've wasted 2 whole weeks in school. Grasping nothing into my brain. Skipping lectures and being late just to sleep because I'm waiting for a call every night. Being sleepy in class is really a headache. You can't seem to absorb anything and you just want to sleep.
I sort of feel angry at myself for still being so complacent after school had started. I still want to have fun when during the holidays, all I had was Fun Fun Fun. Time to start being hardworking again my dear val.
Quizzes are starting next week and this entire weekends I am still thinking about how to waste it away with my friends
School is always sooo boring and tiring but friends always keep school fun and entertaining for me. They make me happy. They guide me, they teach me. Most importantly, I learn more about life from my friends then anyone else... Even the lecturers with their PhD can't teach me anything about life because their too busy studying..
You know, my life sucked for the past 6 months... Out of 6 months, I've only truly been happy for 2 weeks and everything started all over again. You know times like this really want to make me give up in life...
Sometimes I feel so depressed I just want to end my life because I have no mood for anything. But my friends.. How can I leave them. My family.. My sister who needs me as a role model.. My future.. Still a long road ahead.
But it really daunts me.. Like the road up till here is already so miserable and torturous.. Why must I continue.. I have many friends to talk to but talking doesn't make my heart feel better in any way. Yes they take away the pain temporary but in the long run, the pain is always still there...
Every morning I wake up and I wonder what is the purpose of my life. I see no purpose anymore. Everyday I just go to school, look happy, feel super sad on the inside. Every night i go to bed feeling ever so disappointed.
I hate it :( I hate what is happening. I hate empty promises. I hate words that never meant anything. I hate the feeling of being left hanging. I hate it! Its not the first time someone did this to me... When will people stop hurting me and start caring for me.. When..
CCA recruitment drive just ended not long. As the new president of the club, I am quite proud to announce that we have 90 over sign ups. Even close to a 100!!! Its tough job being president. But I will continue to strive hard to bring the standard up up up ~
Really respect Mel because I was really damn stressed for the past few weeks :(
Went Zirca with Jeric and the rest on last Sunday. Waited for the cab till 5.30am in the morning and then only reached home at 6am :(
And the day after sunday, went out to celebrate Hayden's birthday at timbre. Climbed up to Mount Sophia Old school to realise that it wasn't open. Hahaha!!!
And in the end we went to Timbre at Substation..
I can't express how much I love the place. What is better then Beer + Food ???
Omg cider taste sooooo refreshing...
and after which we headed to clarke quay's coffee club...
And spammed poloroids...
Happy 21st Hayden ♥ Love you!!
You're such a good friend and its kinda funny how we even get to know each other :D
Life is hard. The journey is full of obstacles.. But heard that smiling the day away helps in brightening up your day. And so I'm going to fake a smile everyday and hope that things will just get better ...
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| SUPER FAKE SMILE |
On a lighter note, I tried this tongue tattoo thingy. Its a sweet which I got from the bookshop. So cute..!!
Alright I am super tired. I am going off to bed. Sly's birthday celebration is tmr and I wonder what will happen because it sounds damn fun ! :)
Everyday I still hope that things will get better. I want to believe but sometimes.. I just want to give up ever so badly :'(
